The Rest We Didn’t Know We Needed
Growing up, I always knew I wanted to travel. Most of the destinations I had in mind were within the United States — there’s so much to see in this vast country. But I also dreamed of one day visiting other nations. I had already done short-term missions work in Mexico and Haiti, and I hoped to experience many more.
One thing I never imagined, though, was staying at an all-inclusive resort. To me, that sounded like lying around all day, soaking up the sun, and doing nothing. That didn’t feel like the type of vacation I would enjoy — I was all about adventure, exploration, and seeing new places.
But when my wife and I planned a trip to Jamaica for our 10th anniversary, what we discovered was exactly what we had been missing all along: the rest we didn’t know we needed.
A Change of Heart
I had learned a few lessons from our honeymoon, and I knew this trip had to include the things Katie truly loved: warmth, sunshine, and relaxation. Since both of our birthdays are in December, I planned the trip around that time — the perfect escape from the biting cold of North Dakota.
After a lot of research, I booked us at Couples Swept Away, an adults-only all-inclusive resort on 8 Mile Beach. I hoped the resort would look as good in real life as it did in the photos. To my relief, it exceeded them.
From the moment we arrived, exhausted after a long day of travel, we were swept up in its beauty and atmosphere. Our first dinner was at The Palms — a buffet spread with live music. The food was delicious, the entertainment vibrant, and I remember Katie and I looking at each other, realizing how much we had been missing out on.
Discovering a Different Kind of Adventure
The next morning was special: Katie had never seen the ocean before. We grabbed a quick breakfast, then headed to the beach. The turquoise water and white sand stretched endlessly. That moment — watching her see the ocean for the first time — is something I’ll never forget.
The beach became our favorite spot. We lounged in the sun, read books under palm trees, played volleyball, and strolled along the shore. It was a blend of rest and play that felt both natural and deeply refreshing.
One afternoon, a local man known as the “ring ring guy” came by, selling rings made from telephone wire. We didn’t have any money with us, but he gave us two rings anyway, insisting we could pay later. His humor and generosity stuck with us — and though we never saw him again, I still hope to thank him someday.
Another highlight was the sunset catamaran cruise. We sailed past the cliffs near Rick’s Café, swam into caves despite the crashing waves, and slid off the boat’s slide into the ocean like kids. On the way back, the sky turned orange and pink, and someone snapped our photo with the setting sun behind us. It was a moment out of a postcard.
Lesson: Redefining What We Needed
Looking back, this trip was exactly what we both needed. For Katie, it was the warmth of the sun, the ocean air, and romantic walks on the beach. For me, it was discovering that “adventure” doesn’t always have to mean hiking mountains or exploring new cities. Sometimes adventure looks like slowing down, resting, and rediscovering joy in the simple things — reading a book under a palm tree, laughing with locals, or sharing sunsets with the person you love most.
We knew going into this trip that we wanted it to be a time to truly connect with each other again. Over the course of the 10 years we had been married, we had four kids, full-time jobs, and little time for each other. This trip was our reset together. During our walks on the beach, we dreamed about our future, shared what we hoped to accomplish, and rediscovered what it meant to be more than parents and coworkers — to be partners again.
That trip renewed us, not just as travelers, but as a couple. It reminded me that stepping away from everyday demands isn’t selfish — it’s essential. And while I still love rugged exploration, I now understand the beauty of slowing down. The bar was set high at Couples Swept Away, and even now, it’s a memory we carry with us as a reminder to keep making space for rest, renewal, and connection.
Reflection Questions for Couples
- In the busyness of family, work, and daily life, what tends to pull your focus away from your spouse most often?
- If you and your spouse were to plan a “reset” for your relationship, what would it need to include to help you both feel renewed?
- When was the last time you talked openly about your future dreams together? What setting or habit could you create to make that conversation happen more often?
- Looking back at a meaningful trip or moment you’ve shared, what did it teach you about your relationship — and how might you carry that lesson forward into daily life?
Call to Action: Next Steps
- Share one distraction with your spouse this week and agree on a small way to set it aside, even for an evening.
- Dream together about what a reset could look like and choose one realistic step to plan in the next month (a date, a weekend, or even an afternoon together).
- Set aside 30 minutes this week — maybe during a walk or after dinner — to ask each other about your hopes for the next season of life.
- Write down one lesson you don’t want to forget and place it somewhere visible (fridge, journal, phone reminder) as a daily reminder to live it out.
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